Friday, December 31, 2010

The last 2010 post

I have all kinds of news to share about our trip back east for Christmas, but I don't have the energy to do that large of a post at the moment... so I'll be silly instead.

Why you should put smashed banana in your hair instead of gel:

I met this guy once who had a pretty wicked mohawk that he kept standing on his head using hair gel, Crisco, and Elmer's glue. If only he had known about the wonderful properties of banana paste, he could have saved himself some trouble and used a more organic substance.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Flowbee Redemption

Remember that time when my husband tried to cut his hair with a Flowbee? And after that he said he'd sell it on Craig's List? Turns out that not many people are in the market for a Flowbee. Go figure. So, when it came time for Johnny to get his hair cut again, we were faced with a dilemma: shell out another $25 for a hair cut or do it at home. Well, seeing as we aren't interested in getting his hair cut for $25 a pop every time his hair gets shaggy, we decided to try our luck at home. I grabbed some scissors, John grabbed Johnny's head and we got started.

It seems that this cutting hair thing is an awful lot more difficult that the ladies at the salon let on. Using scissors to cut Johnny's hair: FAIL. Using clippers: FAIL (he doesn't like the feeling of them on his skin). So John turns to me and says, "Well, Kelly, we do still have that Flowbee..." I hemmed and hawed a little before finally telling him to hook it up, which he did... giddily. John turned that sucker (ha!) on and I'll be damned if Johnny didn't end up with a decent hair cut. Yeah, it was a little on the bowl-cut side, but hey, at least it was even. So here you are, a little comparison:

Not too shabby, huh? I guess John was right to buy that stupid thing. :)

Monday, December 20, 2010

Birthday Party

The weekend before last (I know, I know, I'm doing this really late...) we celebrated Johnny's first birthday in grand fashion! It was dinosaur-themed, which in my anti-decoration language means the invitations and cake were dinosaur-themed. I didn't take many pictures since I got caught up talking to people, but I have included the ones I did take... including the one of the bomb cake that I made. And it actually tasted okay, too!

He has enjoyed all of the toys that were given to him (the ones that I've let him have so far, that is) and I'm sure is going to start wondering why he only gets new toys once a year when everyone else gets them twice a year... ah, the plight of the December baby.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Dear Johnny

Dear Johnny,

You turned one year old last Monday and it has taken me a whole week to figure out what I want to say in a letter to you... or maybe it took me a whole week to recover from the elevated noise level in this house. Anyway.

I can't say that I've had an easy time learning how to be your mom, not because you were a difficult baby, but I guess because I wasn't prepared for the huge life shift that occurred when you arrived. I don't think you will comprehend how totally and completely you changed my life until you have your own child. There are not words to describe the experience of giving birth to you and watching you learn everything from head control, to feeding yourself to moving on your own. It has been a challenge learning how to mold my life around yours and to forgo my own identity and desires to meet your wants and needs. I'd like to say I'm better at it now than I was a year ago, but you're going to continue to test me in new ways and I'm going to have to figure out how best to meet those challenges.

While you have learned how to be a person this year, I have learned how to be a mommy.

While you will continue to fall and make mistakes as you grow and learn, I will also falter and make errors in judgment as I continue to grow and learn.

All I ask is that you forgive me for anything you may remember later in life... hopefully what they say about childhood trauma does not have anything to do with forgetting to change your diaper until you are totally soaked from your belly button down... but I digress.

I appreciate how much you laugh and smile at me when I do something silly and I love that you are such a busybody. Yes, sometimes I get irritated that you figured out how to open our childproofed cabinets or that you found those scissors I was SURE were in a different place, but I suppose that's all part of being a boy-mom, right? Hopefully you won't be teaching these inconvenient behaviors to your sibling who will be coming along shortly. I'm so excited to see how you fall into your role as big brother (and really hope you learn the command to be "gentle" before we bring home a newborn). I can't wait to see how you two interact and play with each other and if you will protect him/her because you are the big brother. Just remember that I won't love you any less because there is a new baby in the house and I hope you remember that forever.

I hope that you retain your sense of adventure and enjoy exploring new places as much as you do now.

I hope that you continue to find pleasure in the small things like bubbles and dogs.

I hope that you will always laugh when I'm trying to be funny... even when you get older and my jokes are just corny.

I hope that you enjoy being my son as much as I enjoy being your mommy.

I love you very much, Johnny, and can't wait to see what the next year brings!


Saturday, December 18, 2010

A video

I managed to get video of Johnny in all his glory this morning, something I wasn't able to do before posting yesterday. In order to enjoy fully, I suggest turning the volume on your speakers up all the way.

Friday, December 17, 2010


Johnny has learned a completely obnoxious delightful new skill. Shrieking at the top of his lungs. I'm not talking about sweet, excited, happy shrieking that children will resort to in order to convey their pleasure at some game. No, I'm talking about WHY-CAN'T-I-HAVE-THAT-RIGHT-NOW-I-HATE-YOU-MOM kind of shrieking. There is no rhyme or reason for this screaming that I can figure out, he does it when he's happy or frustrated or bored or just downright pissed when he can't have his way. Initially, I tried to give him what he wanted to quell the screaming; for instance, if he was reaching for something on the counter, I would hand him each object in turn to figure out what he wanted. This did not help the screaming situation. Now, I just ignore him when I can. I've decided that worst thing I can do is give some kind of reaction to the screaming so that it is justified, right? Or maybe I just need to give up on that until he learns some words and can communicate more clearly... or something.

All I know is that he learned this horrific invaluable skill right before we have to take a 5 hour flight to the East Coast. Thank you, Johnny, your timing couldn't be worse.

I'm working on a video of the screaming just you can share in this terrible special experience.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Remember that month...

... when I only did five posts in 30 days? Then eventually I revealed that I had used too much room on my computer and needed to clean it out in order to post more pictures and videos? Well, that was true, but the bigger issue was that I was dealing with the disgustingness that is the first trimester and every time Johnny went down for a nap, so did Mommy. Plus, I didn't have morning sickness so much as I had nighttime sickness. By the time Johnny went to bed I just wanted to curl up in the fetal position in my bed and sip water from a glass. Unfortunately this means that my blogging was dismal without any rhyme or reason and for that I apologize.

However, now that I'm 14 weeks pregnant, I feel confident that I can announce to the Interwebz that I am pregnant and am due June 13th, 2011. Yay. I am hoping that I can still report Johnny's happenings from day to day (ish) and keep the amount of complaining down, but we'll see if that happens.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Christmas Card Lane

In our little neighborhood there is a street that dubs itself "Christmas Card Lane" during the month of December. Most of the inhabitants put up lights, decorations and large plywood "Christmas cards" in their front yards. It's really fun to walk up and down the street looking at all of the cards people have put up. Some are very obviously from thirty years ago, but others have more modern characters like Harry Potter or Shrek. It's a good way to get into the Christmas spirit when you live in a place like San Diego that lacks any kind of Christmas-y weather.

Last weekend, John and I took Johnny on his first trip down Christmas Card Lane. I'd say it was a complete success! Johnny didn't cry at all and was even marginally interested in the decorations... probably because they were all bright and colorful. I wanted to get a picture of Johnny in front of a Christmas card, but I kept going to the next house and next house looking for the perfect card to take a picture in front of... and we kind of ran out of options, so here is Johnny with the Shrek Christmas card, which is still quite cool despite being our last option on our walk. :)

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Johnny sleeping

It is very rare to snap a picture of Johnny sleeping since he sleeps in his own room and hardly ever falls asleep in view of any human being. Last week I had to wake him up for a baby gym class we go to on Mondays, so I brought the camera on the off chance he'd stay asleep long enough for me to get a photo or two...

It was really dark in his room, so I didn't realize that I had focuses on his crib bumper instead of his face, but you can still see the adorableness through the blur, right?

He actually fell asleep in my arms yesterday as I was getting him ready for his morning nap and I just sat there in my rocking chair staring at him. It seems like it's been a long time since he has just fallen asleep on me and given me a chance to marvel at how perfect he is. I just spent a few minutes in the dark and quiet, studying his little face and how much it has changed in this last year. I'm so blessed to have such a sweet wonderful little boy. Even though I get really frustrated with him when he does stuff like this:
I suppose should just recall those dark quiet moments of us rocking together yesterday whenever he pulls crap like climbing on the dishwasher.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Bath time fun

John took a whole bunch of pictures of Johnny in the bath after the "baby butt" shoot. And they're adorable. He learned how to splash in the bath recently and that has made for lots of laughs and lots of soaked clothes.

And we're only five days away from his 1st birthday!!! AH!!!

Monday, December 6, 2010

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Holy mother of child-proofing.

I recently [read: two months ago] took all of Johnny's toys upstairs to our "bonus room" with the idea that it would become the play room. Unfortunately this room has been our catch-all room for quite some time and need a little work to be converted to a child friendly place.

First issue: 
TVs and DVD players require cords and the nearest outlet to where the TV is located is behind the bookshelves. Well, if you notice, there is a gap between the TV and the bookcase where the cords lie exposed. I cleverly wedged a basket into this gap, but Johnny is quickly learning to climb over such insignificant obstacles... drat.

Second issue:

The bookshelves themselves. They are stocked with non-child friendly things like my BTSA binder, Shakespeare and old science textbooks. Plus, they are large and definitely able to tip over should Johnny learn to climb... which I think is in the near future.

Third issue:
Random crap. The papa-san chair definitely has to go. I'm not sure where, but it is not a particularly safe place for children to perch. And the bed is taking up all kinds of valuable room that I could use for... more toys. Or something.

So there you have it. Johnny's totally un-child-proofed play room. I'd like to say that posting this makes me feel ashamed enough of the situation to do something about it, but that would require an awful lot of effort... maybe next week.

Friday, December 3, 2010


Last week was Thanksgiving and our little family traveled to Grand Junction, Colorado, to spend time with my stepmom's family. Getting there was a bit of a trial, not gonna lie. First we had to drive to LA on Wednesday since our flight left from LAX early Thanksgiving morning. No problem, right? We'll just drive up there during Johnny's nap time, he'll sleep in the car and we'll stay the night at John's sister's house. Easy.

Well, Johnny slept a solid 40 minutes in the car and that was it for the rest of the day. No more naps for Johnny! You might say, "At least that means he'll sleep well at night!" This is not the case with my child. The more sleep-deprived he gets, the harder time he has falling back asleep when he wakes during the night. So, Johnny goes down at 7PM and gets back up at 2AM. I attempted to get him back to sleep until about 2:45AM and almost succeeded... key word: almost. At this point, even John was awake and he suggested we just get up since our alarms were set for 4AM anyway. We got up, got dressed, got some breakfast and headed to the airport. The flight was fine since Johnny did some eating and then passed out across our laps with his blankee for the last half hour.

After our arrival, it was fun, fun, and more fun! The Motzes are really fun people and very easy to be around. Plus, they are SUPER generous, evidenced by my step-cousin who volunteered her house for us to stay at since she and her family were going elsewhere for Thanksgiving. The best part? She has a baby, too, so everything was (pretty much) baby-proofed, there were age-appropriate toys and a crib for Johnny to stay in. Since we got to stay at her house, we got to sleep all night every night because Johnny had his own space to sleep in... he's not a cuddler. Never has been, never will be. Basically, it made the trip that much better since we got to sleep every night.

Thanksgiving itself was filled with delicious foods (except for green Jell-O... ick) and Johnny CHOWED DOWN! I mean, he ate everything we put in front of him: turkey (white and dark), sweet potato, stuffing, cranberries (whole ones out of the sauce), mashed potatoes, corn casserole, and even green Jell-O.*

The rest of the weekend was spent chatting, watching football, eating and enjoying the beautiful weather. Oh, and attending Kelly and Jake's engagement party on Saturday which was very nice. I had a great time catching up with all of my step-relatives, John had a great time shooting guns with all of his step-relatives-in-law, and Johnny enjoyed taking toys and poking the faces of his step-second-cousins. Too cute.

So thank you for hosting us, Motz family! We had an AWESOME time!

Johnny meeting Mickey the dog for the first time.

LOVE this picture! Kaden is all indignant that Johnny keeps taking his car and Johnny's like "What?"

The nice lady at Enstrom's gave Johnny his first sucker.

He wasn't too pleased with it.

Just in case you didn't notice, we have another top tooth! Tooth count is now up to 5. Yay!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Because everyone loves baby butts!

Well, at least I love baby butts. John thinks it's weird that I want to take naked pictures of our son (only rear view... no genitals please!), but I think it's a girl thing. My brother's girlfriend, Lindsay, says she also likes naked baby pictures, as does my mom, my mother-in-law and pretty much every other mom I've talked to. So, yeah, maybe it's a girl thing.

Anyway, right before Johnny's bath the other night, I managed to remove his pants and diaper before he started squirming and wrestled himself out of my grasp. Instead of getting frustrated (which is my usual reaction... unfortunately) John got out the camera and took some cute pictures.

Monday, November 29, 2010

This one hasn't been posted yet.

Hello all! We have returned from our vacation in Grand Junction and are all happy and a few pounds heavier. I will blog about it later this week, after I have unpacked our suitcases and downloaded some photos... promise. For now, I found a video that I don't think I have posted yet.

After Johnny had been crawling for awhile, I noticed that he showed no interest in climbing the stairs. Of course, I mention to John about how lucky we are that Johnny isn't interested in the stairs. So what happens next? I'm cleaning in the bathroom at the bottom of the stairs and Johnny is playing on the floor next to me... or so I thought. I look around and he's climbed up six or seven stairs! I pull him down, grab the video camera and wait for him to do it again... but he had to be bribed with my phone in order to do it again.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Blog hiatus

Unfortunately, I have run out of space on my computer and thus, cannot upload any more photos or videos until I clean out my hard drive. This means that I won't be updating until I can get that taken care of, and well, in the midst of Thanksgiving, Christmas shopping and preparations for Johnny's birthday, I don't think I'm going to get a chance to do any good updates for awhile. My apologies. I will try to update before Thanksgiving to at least put up a picture or SOMETHING... but we'll see what happens.

Thanks for understanding, everyone!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

A small break

This blog is brought to you by grape quarters and cheddar bunnies! As Johnny munches away happily for a couple of minutes, I decided to bring a small update to this lately abandoned blog.

The following is one of Johnny's new(er) tricks. He sticks all kind of objects in his mouth and then shakes them back and forth like a dog. We're talking blankets, stuffed animals, books, leaves, electrical cords, plastic bags. You know, the innocuous and dangerous alike. (I'm only kidding about the electrical cords and plastic bags. You believed me, didn't you? Thanks for the vote of confidence.)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Let's talk about poop.

*WARNING: This post is not for the squeamish or faint of heart. Bodily functions are described herein and are NOT pretty.*

Now that you've been properly warned, it's time for a poop story. I feel that I've done a pretty good job keeping this blog cute and fuzzy with lots of adorable pictures of Johnny and you know what? It's time to shake that up. And what better way to shake things up than with too much information?

Before bedtime, Johnny's routine pretty much goes like this: bath, crawl around nursery naked, diaper and pajamas, say night-night to various objects outside, nurse, hum two lullabies while being held in the dark, into the crib with his blankie. Can you guess which part of that routine went awry? Yes, the crawling around naked part. Surprise, surprise. Usually, he will just explore his room babbling like crazy while trying to pull down the blinds or the curtains, pull things out of drawers, close his hands in said drawers, etc, etc. Well, this time, he was standing up using the small table I have next to the glider when he got that look. Yes, THAT look. I looked around for anything to catch the end result of THAT look and found his towel from bath time. I shoved the towel underneath him just in time to receive a shockingly large, adult-looking poop. Had I not seen it come out of my little 10-month-old with my own eyes (and believe me, I was RIGHT THERE) I would not have believed he produced it.

After Johnny had finished his bowel movement, I was patting myself on the back for being so quick-witted in picking up the towel and preventing any stains from marring our carpet. I picked Johnny up to move him to the changing table and before I knew it, he had a hold on the soiled towel and was flinging it forward and backward. And yes, we ended up with a nice scattering of poop on the previously-un-poop-stained carpet.

So what did I do next? I called John upstairs and he busted out some latex gloves and a scooper to clean up the mess for me. You can also thank him for telling me not to take a picture of said mess, because I was so ready to run downstairs and grab the camera.

Ah, parenthood. Who knew that such an episode would bring John and me ever closer in our relationship? If you had told me four years ago that poop would someday be part of the glue that held me and my spouse together, I would have said "bullshit"... Oh yes, pun intended.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Happy Halloween!

I have a thing for dinosaurs. Especially the stegosaurus, which is actually a genus of dinosaurs, but whatever. (Fun science/history fact: Did you know that there was a period of time called the "Bone Wars" or the "Great Dinosaur Rush"? Just like the Gold Rush, but with bones. Creepy)

So what was Johnny for Halloween? A dinosaur. Not a stegosaurus, though, more like Reptar from the "Rugrats".

My parents-in-law, John and Gail, came over so we could all go trick-or-treating together. Johnny was a champ and managed to handle trick-or-treating for 30 whole minutes! Hopefully he hasn't set the standard too high for next year.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

New sounds

As Johnny gets closer and closer to talking age, he makes all kinds of fun new sounds. I think this one is John's and my favorite thus far.

Freaking adorable, yes?

Friday, October 29, 2010

Pumpkin carving!

Last weekend John, Johnny and I went to a friend's house for their annual pumpkin carving party and it was a great time! John and I met Nick and Leslie in our childbirth class last year. Johnny and their son, Jacob, are only a month apart and similar in size, which is nice.

We brought our pumpkins, my cookie bouquet and some spinach artichoke dip and had some nice messy fun. Some little girls at the party chose the design I was going to do for my pumpkin and, to my misfortune, they chose a relatively difficult werewolf design. Needless to say, I had to use all of my artistic skill to pull THAT one off. While I carved, Johnny played with the other babies that came to the party, which was ADORABLE. He and Jacob had a great time pushing each other over, pulling the other's hair and poking each other in the face. Neither seemed to mind all that much.

Watching everyone in the backyard

John choosing a pattern to carve

Johnny and Jacob playing together


The pumpkin on the left is John's, the other one is mine.

Me and Leslie with our boys!