The time Johnny let John cut his hair. And he wasn't sleeping.

Johnny hates to have his hair cut. Abhors it. Loathes it. Is absolutely terrified of it. The last time we took him to get his hair cut, we went to a place that specializes in children's cuts. They have cool chairs to sit in, videos to choose from, and screens your children get to stare at while the stylist works their magic. We figured if anything was going to work to get Johnny to calm down during a hair cut, it would be this place.

Nope.

He screamed. And screamed. And screamed. And SCREAMED.

I'm not talking a "Hey! I LIKE my hair! What are you doing to it?" scream. It was more like a "OH MY GOD!!! You're trying to take my arm off! And this is terrifying! Is that a butcher knife??? How could you DO this to me?!?!?!" kind of scream. John had to physically hold him down (after we were moved to the back room so we wouldn't terrify the other patrons) to get the cut done.

It was awful.

Anyone who has grown children says to cherish every moment because childhood goes too fast, but then when my boy's hair gets a little long those same people will tell say, "Wow, he needs a hair cut!"... even AFTER I tell them the haircut story. Well, I decided that life is too short to fight with my children over the length of their hair. I'd rather fight the no-peeing-in-the-house battle. Or the stop-hitting-your-brother battle. I'm completely over the society-says-your-hair-should-be-short-so-I'm-cutting-it battle.

But that doesn't mean I don't like his hair to be short. It's cooler. I don't have to wash it as often. And Hank can't pull it.

So John found a way to get Johnny to cut his hair voluntarily. And all it cost John was his beard and mustache.

He took his job VERY seriously.

Not bad, Johnny. Not bad.

Johnny is obsessed with cutting off John's mustache, so John was able to turn that into a deal. He cuts Johnny's hair, then Johnny gets to cut off John's mustache. And, obviously, it worked. Johnny stayed still the whole time, didn't balk at the clippers and followed all of John's instructions.

His hair - after shearing

Now John is growing his back beard because Hank needs a haircut. :) What a man.

Red cake

I feel like many moms on facebook are often saying something like, "Kid1 and I made brownies today! Then we busted out eight kinds of cookies and decorated them perfectly with royal icing. And to top it off, we made our own baked, painted and glazed some clay plates, so we could put the cookies on them and hand them out to our neighbors. It was SO MUCH FUN!"
I am not one of those moms. I made brownies with Johnny once, when he was about 27 months and I ended up with three broken eggs on the floor, wet brownie mix on the floor, in my hair and all over Johnny's head. The brownies were good, mind you, but it was not what I would call SO MUCH FUN.

So I decided to try again today. The boys were asking for cake and I agreed to give them some as long as we made it at home. I got out all of the cake mix flavors I had so they could choose a flavor (red velvet, because Johnny wanted a purple cake and it was closest I could get), then I got out the step stool so we could all mix up the ingredients. Johnny lost interest before I even set up the step stool, preferring to sit at the counter eating Goldfish demanding cake right this instant. Meanwhile, Hank stood on the stool and added the water and oil (with my guidance) and tried to crack an egg, but was not okay with having a hand covered in egg whites. Then he was done. Down he went to stand at the back door asking to be let outside to paint. I finished the rest of the mixing, pan greasing, batter pouring, cake baking and frosting making to end up with a cake.

I may have done the majority of the work, but they thought otherwise and man, they were so proud of the cake they made. And they were so cute eating the cake and saying "Mmmmm! Great cake, Hank/Johnny!" that it was completely worth it.

Stuffing their faces

I think they approved.

And now I have a ridiculous amount of cake left.

I have come to the conclusion that when a parent says, "My 18-month-old and I made chocolate cookies today!" What they really mean is, "I mixed up the cookies, dropped them onto baking sheets and baked them while my 18-month-old added a cup of sugar and then decided that pulling everything out of the kitchen cabinets was more interesting."

This post brought to you by...

While many people are familiar with caffeine, many don't trouble to recognize it's molecular structure. You're welcome.

Seriously, it's the only way I get through the day with a semblance of a smile on my face. Funny, considering I used to proclaim that I would NEVER get addicted to coffee.

See, growing up, my mom used to work the night shift at the local hospital; she was (and still is) an RN. She'd work two to three 12-hour shifts (from 7pm to 7am) a week and would pick up an extra here and there when we needed to pay for something, like a vacation or Christmas gifts or what not. The woman LOVED her coffee. It was common knowledge to everyone who knew her, which means that her birthday and Christmas gifts were coffee-related. Thus, when we moved out to San Diego, she had to part with more than 20 coffee cups.

Anyway, returning from the tangent. She used to talk to me about how she would get headaches at certain times in the day if she didn't have enough coffee and that sounded horrible to me. Headaches? From withdrawal? Well, then I'll NEVER drink that much coffee!!!

Fast forward to two kids later: I'm addicted. I don't even work night shifts (or any shifts for that matter) and I can't make it through the day without at least one cup. Most days I require two. Sometimes more if Johnny's being particularly difficult... I'm serious, it helps. My mood mysteriously elevates after I down a cup of caffeine-filled goodness, which brings me to a statement one of my mommy friends made recently: "The only reason I am the mom I am is coffee."

At least I know I'm not the only one who is "using".

The time I got Johnny to wear pants.

I know the title of this post makes it sound like Johnny never wears pants, but what I really mean is that he usually only wears shorts. I've tried to put long pants on him on a few occasions, but he just ends up standing there looking me while crying, "OFF!! Pants off!!" and squirming as he tries to remove them on his own. Up until now I've always given in and then put him in shorts. Now that's getting colder, it's much more practical for him to be in pants. So I tried it this past week.

Turns out that all I had to do was put them on while he was watching Cars. The best part? He didn't complain about them at all. Not once during the entire day. I must say, they make him look an awful lot older, don't you think?

This is where I need to rave about Oshkosh jeans and their designers: PURE GENIUS! See, Johnny has a big belly and very narrow hips, thus, jeans do not stay on him unless they have elastic in the waistband. Well, when I went to Oshkosh to get Johnny some new clothes, I was dumbfounded that they do not have elastic waistbands... what they have instead is adjustable elastic! Even though they're a little stretchy, I can make the waist even smaller if I need to, like when he's going through a growth spurt and gets all skinny. Then when he's eating a lot and getting chubby, I can make the waist bigger so it doesn't bother him as much. Those baby clothes people sure know what they're doing!

Gift buying guide for a 1-year-old

Before I had a child of my own, I never had any clue what to give a child for a special occasion. I would Google "children gifts" and would be bombarded with products that I had never seen before. So I thought I'd put together a little guide for anyone who needs help... like I did.

First thing to know: it doesn't have to be something they will use right away. The second year of life is full of changes; if they don't play with it at 12 months, they may be all over it at 18 months. So keep that in mind.

Second thing to think about: How well do you know the parents? Some parents don't give their kids toys with batteries. Some parents prefer not to have loud toys in the house. Some parents only want to give their children educational toys. Take these things into consideration, but don't stress too much. Most parents are like John and me, so any toy you give will be played with and enjoyed. But if you're not sure, go with a best bet, as I have indicated with a (*) below.

Third thing to know: AVOID SMALL PARTS! Kids stop compulsively putting things in their mouths in the second year of life (ish), but that doesn't mean they won't see a small game piece and attempt to choke on it. If the toy has a small piece that has you second guessing, play it safe and find something else.

Fourth thing to remember: Gift receipts. I've gotten a few gifts for Johnny and Hank that we already had and couldn't return because I didn't have a receipt for them. I re-gifted them to others or donated, but I hated to do it since I know how much effort goes into choosing a present for someone. Be a kind gift-giver, include a receipt.

Last thing: It doesn't have to be a really complex toy for them to like it. One of Johnny's favorite toys is a wooden truck that has wooden animals that go with it. It's very simple, but Johnny loves to push it around, put the animals in and take the animals out. Children generally have simple tastes.

Gift ideas:

*1. Books - Always a winner, but make sure they're the board kind - toddlers are still pretty rough on things. Johnny has really enjoyed the Matthew Van Fleet books that we have, but anything that has texture and/or rhyming is a good choice.

*2. Simple puzzles - Kids this age are working with matching shapes and motor function, both of which are addressed by puzzles. However, they need to be pretty simple and have knobs for easy pick up. Melissa and Doug has a great selection of wooden knob puzzles that would be great for a one-year-old.

3. Imaginative play toys - Kids love to mimic their parents, so if you can provide something age-appropriate that looks like something their parents use, you've probably got a winner. Some toy examples: phones, remote controls, cameras, kitchen utensils, shopping cart, dolls, etc.

4. Trucks - This is definitely something that boys like, though I'm not sure about girls. I know that Johnny has all kind of trucks to play with: cement trucks, tow trucks, tractors, fire trucks, etc. Some are battery-operated and play music, others are wooden and come with wooden accessories. Again, complexity isn't going to matter here.

*5. Blocks - Johnny still loves blocks. Big Lego-type blocks, cardboard blocks, squishy blocks, and wooden blocks still keep his attention. One-year-olds are still working on motor function (as mentioned earlier), so stacking blocks is a great way to build those motor skills. Plus what is more fun than having Mom build a tower so you can destroy it? Nothing, I tell you. Toddlers love destruction.

The bottom line: A gift that you have put some thought into will surely loved by a one-year-old, but try not to over-analyze it... despite all of the instructions I just threw out there. :)

Anyone else have other things to add to my list? I'd love to have more ideas up here!

A day in the life

I made this post awhile ago with the intent to add some more to it about our bedtime routine, but then I went and had another kid, so this isn't how our life goes anymore, but it's still cute. 

Okay, I tried really hard to do a "day in the life" post (as stolen from my sister-in-law's friend Stacey), but I have the hardest time remembering to take pictures... so I made it until right before bedtime and then stopped. Oh well. Johnny was having a tough night and probably didn't want to be documented anyway.

7:20am

7:30am

8:00am

8:15am

8:20am

9:30am

9:35am

10:10am

12:30pm

1:10pm

3:00pm

3:15pm

4:30pm

4:40pm

4:41pm

4:42pm

4:45pm

6:15pm

6:45pm

Flowbee Redemption

Remember that time when my husband tried to cut his hair with a Flowbee? And after that he said he'd sell it on Craig's List? Turns out that not many people are in the market for a Flowbee. Go figure. So, when it came time for Johnny to get his hair cut again, we were faced with a dilemma: shell out another $25 for a hair cut or do it at home. Well, seeing as we aren't interested in getting his hair cut for $25 a pop every time his hair gets shaggy, we decided to try our luck at home. I grabbed some scissors, John grabbed Johnny's head and we got started.

It seems that this cutting hair thing is an awful lot more difficult that the ladies at the salon let on. Using scissors to cut Johnny's hair: FAIL. Using clippers: FAIL (he doesn't like the feeling of them on his skin). So John turns to me and says, "Well, Kelly, we do still have that Flowbee..." I hemmed and hawed a little before finally telling him to hook it up, which he did... giddily. John turned that sucker (ha!) on and I'll be damned if Johnny didn't end up with a decent hair cut. Yeah, it was a little on the bowl-cut side, but hey, at least it was even. So here you are, a little comparison:

Not too shabby, huh? I guess John was right to buy that stupid thing. :)

6 month doctor's visit

Johnny had his 6 month visit with the pediatrician on Wednesday and it wasn't as stellar as his other visits. Here are the stats:

Weight: 17lbs. 2 oz. - 52nd percentile
Height: 27.5in - 76th percentile
Head circumference:

Okay, I can't find the paper that had his information printed on it with percentiles and such, so I only remember height and weight, the important ones I suppose.

Now, why isn't this stellar? Well, he lost 4 oz. from his 4 month visit. That's right, he hasn't gained any weight and he has only grown 1/2 inch. (Though to be honest, the height measurement isn't exactly accurate every time.) The biggest issue is his weight. He went from being in the 92nd percentile to the 52nd. Big problem. Normally, we'd come back when he turned 9 months for another well visit, but since he didn't gain any weight, the doctor wants to see him again in 6 weeks. If he hasn't gained any weight by then, we'll have to start supplementing with formula because my breastmilk isn't nutritious enough. Talk about a blow to the ego.

And the livin's E.A.S.Y.

In my previous post, I made Johnny's disgust for napping known. I talked about the entrance of the lovely vacuum into our lives and my ingenious idea of making vacuum songs for Johnny to fall asleep to, so his nap looked something like this:

 Observe the iPod speakers in the bottom left corner. And the swing needed to get him to sleep.

Well, I take it all back. After almost week of trying to get to him to nap during the day, we're not doing so hot. He has decided that napping is not his thing and he can resist the magic of the vacuum noise if he really wants to. This has lead to him being severely overtired and thus, totally fussy and inconsolable in the evening, as Grandma Durso can attest to. I have decided that it's not okay to have a child who is overtired! The poor thing is so worked up that he can't get himself to sleep; it's tragic, really. Who doesn't love sleep?

And so I turned to my dear friend, the Interwebz.

I discovered a method called E.A.S.Y. by Tracy Hogg that revolves around making a pattern for your infant so they learn what to expect after a certain amount of time and to make it easier for exhausted moms to tell apart their child's cries. Oh, and to get their child some rest so that their cries actually sound different.
E: Eat
A: Activity
S: Sleep
Y: Your time (during the sleep)
The best part is, it's not a "cry it out" method, which I don't think I could handle, but was willing to try to get my poor son to sleep. All I have to do is follow the above chain of events and work on getting him into a rhythm. Ideally, he'd be on a 3-hour cycle, so he eats for 30 minutes, plays for 30 - 60 minutes and naps for 90 - 120 minutes. However, since the author stresses that every child is different  you need to refer to your child's cues, not a clock. Granted, it's not an easy thing to achieve, so it'll take some time. Hopefully, after a week (that's the average time it takes to take effect), I'll have a more rested, happier infant. So we can deviate from this:

To this:

 

It's a work in progress.